Monday, June 7, 2010

But We're So Different...

I think it is a good idea to impose our expectations upon those we desire romantically, and just pretend they are more similar to ourselves than they are...

Although some people feel the need to really "connect" to someone on a deeper level, it is not always possible or feasible...

We will always be "alone" in ourselves anyway, no matter who we love, we leave this world as we entered it—alone.....

12 comments:

Altie said...

that is not true. and btw, thanks for linking to my blog.

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

You're welcome, but perhaps you can be SLIGHTLY more specific as to why it's not true? ; )

Altie said...

that is so sad to say we will always be alone and leave alone. do you not believe that it is possible to reach such a deep level of love that you cease to be just you and become part and one with the other person?

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

Oh no, I admit that it's possible to find like minded individuals Ms. Altie, but to the extent which most of us truly desire, I think it's unlikely. And it really narrows your possibilities. Anyway, there are also essential differences between male and female minds.

So I say just settle with a person you're able to get along with. Admire them for being quirky, nerdy and intellectual like you (not like YOU, just an example), even though they might see themselves as tough jocks who aren't interested in much (bad example, I know. Couldn't think of anything off hand). As long as you both see there being a core compatibility...

Altie said...

I still disagree. I dont plan on 'settling'. That was for the old generation, and then they lived together and never spoke to each other. No thanks.

Ok I see we are not going to agree. That's fine.

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

"such a deep level of love that you cease to be just you and become part and one with the other person"- That's actually a pretty deep line though, I like it. "Cease being you"... I don't know if that's really possible though. You're you. They're them. You just happen to know each other and have had kids with each other and live in the same house. Still, you don't REALLY 'know' them...

I was just introduced to the work of this comedian, and I agree that his sentiments at the beginning of this video do exist, to a greater or lesser extent, with any two people married to each other...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcnXpOygKGI&feature=related

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

"I dont plan on 'settling'"- Not at all? Might be single for a long time then! : )

Altie said...

I wouldn't call it settling. And no thank you, I don't plan on being single for that much longer.

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

I don't see it as unlikely. I'm sure you'll hook it up soon...

Can't believe I missed the wedding last week though. That was messed up. I wanted to go..

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

If (you, or) someone who ends up reading this post is curious:

In regards to dying alone though, i was inspired partially from a scene from the film "Donnie Darko", in which the story's protagonist tells of his dog going under the patio to "be alone" when it died, and also partially from the series finale of "Lost", in which it turns out that the alternate reality scenes are really a joint hallucination they all had at the hour of their deaths, to imagine they were reunited with their loved ones, even though they did in fact die lonely deaths...

Sorry if it's a bit of a morbid idea.

ה' יצילנו מכל דבר רע, ויאריך ימינו בטוב ושנותינו בנעימים, אכי"ר

kisarita said...

Altie, no I don't think we find someone who we can ever really become one person with. There are those moments but that's all they are, they aren't a lifestyle.
But still, that does NOT mean we must be alone. You can have people, even just friends, not lovers, around you who love and value and fill your soul just the same.

Rabbi Lars Shalom said...

wow